I don't know what I am supposed to feel.

• Like I said in subject line I just don't know what I'm supposed to feel or do. Feeling very lonely right now. Wishing I had someone to share my life with. But like it's been all my life except for about six months worth I'm always alone. I can never get a woman to be interested in me. That should say except that this smoke drink drugs or whatever but I can never find a true woman to fall in love with me. And what stinks I pray about this all the time that the Lord will show me the one he wants for me in my life. And I thought I found her. But I was wrong I guess I'm supposed to be alone. Which really stinks. And what really stinks also is that I seem to be pretty good with kids. But at my age I'll never have any of my own. Therefore I cannot understand why I get readings from chronicles all the time when I pray about finding someone. Probably a good thing that I will never have anyone in my life anyways. Because way my luck finances are going I'll be going to be on the streets in two years anyways. So again why in the hell am I alive and why was I born. I don't get it because I should've been dead so many times from different things especially lighting. I just feel like such a loser.