About dad

Well my dad goes in for a procedure to check the veins in his legs on Monday morning. Kind of worried that things might go wrong. But praying things will go well. Dad's big toe is doing a lot better than what it was. This is on the foot that they might have to take off eventually. For the most part we been told since dad's toenail came off that told and what not that it's not good. But since the beginning of the new year's toe has gotten better and is starting to grow a toenail once again. Because most of the time once a toenail is gone it does not return our thing that happens is the cut off moreand more. If anyone is reading this you been praying for my dad thank you. Now I just wish I could find someone to share my life with Oh well. Here's to being alone the rest my life.

I don't know what I am supposed to feel.

• Like I said in subject line I just don't know what I'm supposed to feel or do. Feeling very lonely right now. Wishing I had someone to share my life with. But like it's been all my life except for about six months worth I'm always alone. I can never get a woman to be interested in me. That should say except that this smoke drink drugs or whatever but I can never find a true woman to fall in love with me. And what stinks I pray about this all the time that the Lord will show me the one he wants for me in my life. And I thought I found her. But I was wrong I guess I'm supposed to be alone. Which really stinks. And what really stinks also is that I seem to be pretty good with kids. But at my age I'll never have any of my own. Therefore I cannot understand why I get readings from chronicles all the time when I pray about finding someone. Probably a good thing that I will never have anyone in my life anyways. Because way my luck finances are going I'll be going to be on the streets in two years anyways. So again why in the hell am I alive and why was I born. I don't get it because I should've been dead so many times from different things especially lighting. I just feel like such a loser. 

Feeling so alone.

Wish I had a women in my life. Sad that I got to look at websites and other things to see women let alone naked women. Can't seem to find anyone who wants see me especially naked. I hate being alone. I wish someone wanted to share their life with me. I know I can be an ass at times. Who isn't an ass at times?  I seem to be good with kids.  Anyways. This asshole is done for now.